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| What Animal Would You Be? |
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Forum Index - Serious Business - Talk - What Animal Would You Be? |
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| Posted on 2011-06-10 03:39:37 PM |
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In an attempt to get you psyched for the thread, hear my little anecdote...
On the top of the great Mountain Of Doom (MOD for short), stood DDM. The winter was bitterly cold, and had claimed many unfortunate climbers. In fact, so many had perished that there frozen bodies had doubled the height of the mountain, creating an even greater peril when trying to scale it. DDM believed in the power of love, and was able to climb this 666 mile behemoth in only 70 years.
He had aged a lot in that time, and was close to his final breath on this planet. He had heard great secrets lay on the top of this mountain, namely the power to wish for anything your soul desires. He stood outside what appeared to be a small hut. The hut that gave this promised salvation he desired.
He entered.
On a stool, sat an old and withered Chuck Norris. Now only a shadow of his former self, which was still pretty God-damn awesome. He got up, and swung his great beard like the mane of a wild lion.
"Chuck, what happened to you?"
He smiled, to hide the pain he was suffering inside. He went over to DDM, put his arm around him and said:
"When you reach 900 years old, this good you will not look!"
DDM got the Yoda reference. It had been a long time since he had battled the sith beside his master, but he still felt the force flow around him.
DDM cut to the chase.
"You see Chuck, all my life I have climbed this mountain, to make a wish from the very bottom of my soul..."
"What would that be...young one?"
"Aha! Flattery will get you nowhere Chuck! My wish, it is to learn the fabled knowledge....the thing of ancient myths and folklore. I want to be able to speak ASM."
Chuck Gasped. The gasp was so powerful it blew the whole hut away.
"I've been around 900 years DDM. I've been a hero, legend...and an internet meme. I've seen it all. Not in 890 years, have I heard of ASM. It is a forbidden tongue, some say you go mad from simply hearing it. I can not."
DDM was a little pissed now.
"Look Chuck, I spend my whole bloody life climbing this mountain, and you won't teach it to me? Great, what a waste of my life. I may as well have picked my arse for 70 years, you old bastard."
Chuck thought, DDM knew this because he felt the waves coming from his head.
"How about I reincarnate you as an animal, DDM?"
DDM looked around at the mountain, and decided it would not be possible to just jump off the side of the cliff to get back down.
"....What the hell? Could be fun, I guess."
"Just one question." Chuck uttered.
"WHICH ONE DO YOU WANT TO BE?"
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So this thread is asking, if you could be any animal, what would it be? Don't just post which animal though, that's boring, has no character to it. Put some effort into it. What animal would you be? What would you be called? Appearance? Gender? Names of friends? What life is like? Interests? What you do to survive? They are just examples, not guidelines or anything.
I'll go first.
I would be a male Hyena named Snake Bolfar (Snake was what I was actually going to be called in real life, no joke.) who would hang with the cool British Hyena gang . Nice cut fur, and trendy glasses. I would wear a Trilby hat to cover a mysterious scar I received whilst fighting Scarface.
Why Hyena? Hyena's know how to have a laugh, plus there pretty cool. I would be a well respected author in the human community, under the alias "Chuck Norris". I would write horror novels, and an autobiography of my life known as "The Lion King", best-seller at Waterstones, not to brag! I dream to become the greatest breakdancer in all of the land, and never give up my dream. I eventually challenge Simon Cowell to a rap battle, which blows his mind. I then become the voice for a main character in a pixar film.
I end up letting the fame get to my head, and use all my money to build a house out of hentai novels, which represents all my ambitions in this life. Chuck Norris realises I have become too powerful, and descends down the mountain for one last duel....
Here is a fantastic picture of me, spared no expense!
If anyone else wants to draw themselves as an animal, feel free to.
Now it's your turn.
*slams paw on the hardwood table*
"You ready?"
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| Last edited on 2011-06-11 04:24:46 AM by DDM295. |
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| Posted on 2011-06-10 05:06:27 PM |
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A pony. My name would be chocolate helicopter. I'd be king of the horses ponies on the farm. His breeding partner is a pony named Fluttershy. He survives by eating his hay and oats.
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| Posted on 2011-06-10 05:35:24 PM |
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I'd be a snail in my garden called Gaylo and I would eat leaves all day!
I'd be one hell of a shuffler and everybody seeing my dance would instantly learn how to dance like me (just a little less good because I'm one hell of a shuffler).
I would wear a trendy snail house with and spread my hip slime everywhere I go, leaving girls as boys equally aroused by my sheer presence.
My job would be to milk cows, which is quite easy for me, as they start giving me their liquids as soon as I start to dance on their backs, my sexy snail body caressing their sweaty fur, leaving behind my own essence everywhere I touch them and the hedgehogs shyly watching me getting off the moo-cows would extend their spikes at the sight.
Needless to say, my most favourite activity would be being myself!
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| Posted on 2011-06-10 05:50:44 PM |
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i would be... THE WALRUS, GOO GOO G'JOOB GOO GOO GOO G'JOOB.
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| Last edited on 2011-12-30 01:54:54 PM by leictreon. |
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| Posted on 2011-06-10 05:59:56 PM |
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i'd be a cat called lazy-ass and you can probably guess
But seriously though, A FLYING PIG NAMED BOB! I would wanna be a... Dragon, maybe, if that counts? :3
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| Posted on 2011-06-11 02:58:11 AM |
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Originally posted by GoldenSonic15i'd be a cat called lazy-ass and you can probably guess
But seriously though, A FLYING PIG NAMED BOB! I would wanna be a... Dragon, maybe, if that counts? :3
Well, I don't see why not. The odds of turning into a dragon are pretty much equal to the odds of turning into any animal.
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| Posted on 2011-06-11 03:08:22 AM |
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I would be a unicorn with a supreme prejudice for ponies.
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| Posted on 2011-06-12 06:14:49 AM |
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I'm starting to think that my story has not enticed people by putting the situation into a 'believable' context, but rather it has frightened and disturbed them. I seem to be quite good at that.
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| Posted on 2011-06-12 10:03:57 AM |
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I would be a parrot.
Why? I have no idea.
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| Posted on 2011-06-12 10:18:42 AM |
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If it counts:
A Dragon
Or a Cat Furry
If not:
A cat.
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| Posted on 2011-06-12 09:05:11 PM |
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I would want to be...A wolf =) Because they are just so mysterious, as so am I.
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| Posted on 2011-06-13 07:37:40 PM |
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Dragon, for sure.
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| Posted on 2011-06-13 07:43:40 PM |
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I change cat to wolves, as I have offically fell in love with the wolf species.
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| Posted on 2011-06-14 04:48:10 AM |
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Well, I'd have to say Kingrayon. (If they were real. Don't know what they are? Read my story.) Following that would be Dragon if it counts for anything. Following up next would be a wolf, a cat/tiger, and one last one could be... umm, I haven't decided that last yet. I'll come back to you on that.
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| Posted on 2011-06-14 10:00:01 AM |
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A giraffe because I'm tall. Simple as that. I could also be a carrot
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| Posted on 2011-06-14 01:59:09 PM |
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a tortoise. i'm slow, stubborn, hate change, few mates and, in general, DGAF.
note: i didn't choose something i particularly, like.
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| Posted on 2011-06-14 04:17:32 PM |
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I suppose a cat would be cool, since I'd pretty much get to do whatever I want all day.
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| Posted on 2011-06-14 05:39:35 PM |
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i always saw myself as a 200 cc food processor called the Oh-bliterator Thousand!
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| Posted on 2011-06-16 03:59:38 PM |
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A cat. Why? Because I could be as lazy as I want, and nobody could care less about me, besides feeding me, and giving me water, a decent home, and a kitty litter to do my droppings in.
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| Posted on 2011-06-18 03:23:34 AM |
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Wolves are like super awesuuum. I'd probably pick that, also considering an irl nickname of mine is Wolfman because I'm a hairy fuck. lol
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Forum Index - Serious Business - Talk - What Animal Would You Be? |
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