for the most part it's alright, though in my opinion some parts sound a little off, like the weird pitch bends in the @0 and the panning (i'm not sure if i really hear panning in the original to begin with). a few harmonies to the @0 near the end are also missing. these things are small nitpicks however, so nothing to be upset about really.
i'd also recommend giving all instruments a stronger attack given how none of them in the original are more than simple synth waves. that's just a personal preference though.
optimization wise there doesn't seem to be any hiccups, except for things like this: [ g f+ ]2
if the total number of notes you're optimizing (4 in this case) is less than 7, then doing very small loops like these is actually increasing the insert size, so just leave these as they are.