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Paper John Land - xxchainchomp01
Forum Index - Valley of Bowser - Moderation Questions - Hacks - Paper John Land - xxchainchomp01
Pages: « 1 »
Name: Paper John Land
Author: xxchainchomp01 (submited by cheat-master30)
Description: Another hack by xxchainchomp01 (uploaded by request) The story is (from his trailer description):



As Paper John was sailing the ocean with his wooden ship, he had came across a dreadful storm that swept his ship around and tore it up. The morning after, he ended up on an island never before seen called Side Island. There are so many bizzar creatures and rumor has it, treasure on the island. A few days after Paper John explores the Island, an evil spirit appears before him called Queen Yogigglius. She is determined to take over this land and sink it into the sea never again to be seen by human eye. Since Paper John does not think this is a good idea not only because he will go down with the island himself, but all the undiscovered creatures too. As he moves around Side Island packing up treasures, his main focus is to reach Queen Yogigglius's lair and to defeat her and to gain the power she has, to save the land and to return home with a new ship.

Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SeSWw_9uQpU


Note: since you didn't make this hack, you should show this removal log to the author so he/she can fix it.

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General issues.
This hack had too many issues to be accepted. First of all, while most of the levels had a good design, some of them could be a lot better. Secondly, the hack didn't look very good aesthetically, most of the sprites graphics could look better, also the backgrounds were very simplistic and there were many bad palettes in the hack. Finally, I was unable to go beyond the first world, after I beat the castle there's no way I can continue; you should fix that.


As I said, a lot of graphics could look a lot better. Paper John’s face looks quite simplistic compared to the rest of his body. Also look at the background, the color surrounding those trees is different from the grass color. Oh, and what's that weird thing in the status bar above the timer?


The animation of Paper John getting big doesn't look good at all...


...And his wings move a lot more than they should, they don't even stay in place.


These things are not the best way to make level enders.


If I take a fire toast while ridding Bostro, he runs away.


The sun doesn't fade correctly in some levels

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Overworld

All the paths and levels are revealed from the beginning even if they're not accessible yet, which is quite confusing. Use overworld events in order to make the paths and levels appear when they become accessible. Also, I'm able to skip the level I'm standing on. By the way, I advise you to give the levels actual names instead or "World x-x". Finally, some levels have red tiles even though they don't have a secret exit.


That bridge appeared above the castle after I cleared the level I'm standing on right now.

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World 1-1

Bostro's fireballs have a bad palette.


The water gets cutoff by that block.


Easy 3-up.


The blue ledge in the background has a bad palette; the outlines should be black instead of white.

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Paper John's house

This doesn't look like a house; it's just a pile of dirt.


And those don't look like windows


Easier 3-up. Those things are supposed to be very hard to find, you shouldn’t place them in the way like that.

--
World 1-2


Those coins are traps.


You shouldn't use the bottom row in Lunar Magic, it doesn't appear in game.


If I enter any of these pipes, I die.


You placed too many Bostro blocks near each other. This is just a cheap way to farm 1-ups.


The mole hole uses a different color than the ledge.


If I die after taking the midpoint, I have very little time to react before I get killed by this fish.

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World 1-3
This level was really short compared to the rest of the levels in your hack. It was also quite empty.


I got killed by that invisible note block while trying to jump. Don't place traps like that.


The sprite spawned when I jump on these note blocks doesn't look very good.


It's not visible in this screenshot, but this was actually a blind jump.


This yellow switch turned blue when I pressed it. This was the only exit of this level, by the way, so I don't see what's the point on placing this switch since there's no way I can continue without activating it; Switches should be hidden in secret places.

--
World 1-4
This level was also quite short, not to mention half of the level is just a boring star run.


The sprite spawned when I hit the switch palace block doesn't look good.


Bad initial camera position.

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World 1-5

This level had almost no enemies around which makes the level feel quite empty; this is not good, especially not in and auto-scroll level.

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World 1-6

Bad initial camera position again.


Again, you shouldn't use the bottom row in Lunar Magic. Also, activating that secret exit did nothing.


Those arched ledges have bad palettes.

--
Side Monster #1

This level had a lot of segments like this one; don't do that, it makes your level feel repetitive. Also, the floating stairs are cutoff.


The background has a bad palette.

And this is where I stopped since I was unable to go on.



Summary
The first levels were quite good in level design terms, but the later ones could be a lot better. You also need to improve the aesthetics of your hack. Other than that, most of the issues in this hack could be prevented if you had some beta testers, you should get some friends to test your hack for you before you submit it again.

Read the hack submission guidelines. You can also read this and this in order to improve your level design.
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